


Old Town Road

by Weeaboocorpse



Category: One Piece
Genre: Alternate Universe - Western, Other, Parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-22
Updated: 2019-06-12
Packaged: 2020-03-09 09:47:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,262
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18914479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Weeaboocorpse/pseuds/Weeaboocorpse
Summary: The gold star poked into Luffy’s chest as his grandfather tried to get the damn thing straight. He really did not want to be here, but he had no other choice. It was either listen to his grandfather, become a law enforcing citizen, or go to jail for an indeterminate amount of time.Luffy just really did not want to eat prison food; he heard it was disgusting.An Arlong Park arc crossover heavily inspired by the movie Blazing Saddles by Mel Brooks.I hope you enjoy. The story is finished, I'm just publishing on a weekly basis for dramatic effect.





	1. Ride Till I Can't No More

The gold star poked into Luffy’s chest as his grandfather tried to get the damn thing straight. He really did not want to be here, but he had no other choice. It was either listen to his grandfather, become a law enforcing citizen, or go to jail for an indeterminate amount of time.

Luffy just really did not want to eat prison food; he heard it was disgusting.

That was party the reason why he is moseying his way onto his mandatory suspension. The other part of him wanted to get as much distance between him and his grandfather as was physically possible.

He had been reckless, even he could tell that, but he still could not figure out how going against his grandfather’s rules landed him with a cushy sheriff’s gig.  The way the officers unlocking his cuffs were laughing at the name of the town he had a duty to protect made the young man feel uneasy.

Arlong Park.

Luffy wasn’t sure why, but he thought of the ocean; a cool sharpness with a hidden darkness.

He looked past the brim of his straw hat to the vast desert ahead, his elbow resting on the horn of his saddle. His head, tilted, was loosely placed on his bent hand as he wondered what kind of adventure this next one was going to be.

~~

“The new Sherriff should be in today,” Franky announced to the patrons of the bar, lazily cleaning a glass for reuse. It wasn’t much of a welcome party, but not many of the villagers cared about each Sherriff that wondered into town. All the bright eyed army rejects trying to tame the west to soothe their own ego.

Each one fell under the power of Arlong.

Franky tried his best to get by, he would not say it was easy, but once in a while the owner had to look the other way for a woman late at night doing what she had to do to eat. A soft bed and a hot meal in exchange for a cut of her earnings didn’t seem too immoral, was it?

“How long do you think this one is gonna last?” Chopper asked, his brown eyes looking up at the older man as he nursed a small drink.

“Depends on how long it takes for him to find out about Arlong,” the bartender responded. Chuckling, the dark haired man wondered if this one would ask about a big corporation got a town named after it so fast, but considering that most of the population shared the last name Johnson, the founders were left with a small pool of ideas of differentiate their town.

Arlong was a man who his power and influence to keep a town ‘peacefully’ under his fist, each member too scared to fight back. Those who fight back either die, or are bought out and forced to work on the railroads. The path this new Sherriff will take is his own route to decide, it was not the town’s problem if someone wanted to stir up trouble. They had been put through hell. They deserved at least some semblance of peace.

Someone had tried to tell the army about what the fraudulent business man was truly doing to those around them. Ever since then, the army sends a serviceman to check in on the town to make sure they are not in any duress. Since then, the taxes were that required for them to live this peaceful life only went up; straining the already starving town.

~~~~

Luffy walked into the Sherriff’s Office only to find it seemingly empty of people, only the faint sound of snoring. He made his way over to the cell door, only to see a green-haired man sitting on a small cot in his cell, sleeping.

“Are we awake?” Luffy asked.

“We’re not sure,” the stranger immediately grumbled. “Who are you?”

“Luffy, I’m the new sheriff,” Luffy answered. The stranger reached underneath the cot that served as his bed, pulling out a rather large bottle of alcohol.

“Is that good?” Luffy asked, his stomach beginning to gurgle. The stranger then proceeded to chug the originally half full bottle.

“I like it,” the stranger smiled.

“What’s your name?” Luffy asked.

“My name is Zoro, but” He paused. “Most people call me…Zoro.”

“Okay, Zoro. What are you in here for,” Luffy asked, wondering why this interesting man was locked away here.

“Some kid challenged me to a duel. I knew I could beat him, easily,  so I told him to go home. I turned my back thinking it was over,” Zoro looked up, Luffy now noticing the scar on his left eye. “The little bastard stabbed me in the ass.”

“They arrested you for that?”

“No. They arrested me for pissing on the saloon. A saloon I used to drown out the pain of getting stabbed in the ass.”

Luffy unlocked the cell and offered the man a seat.

He had clearly been through enough.

“Arlong,”

“What?” The large man grumbled.  

“The army’s new sacrifice has arrived,” One of the men told his leader.

“Would anyone like to kill him?” Arlong announced to the group. The small crowd erupted in men clamoring over who should take out the new sheriff. It wasn’t until one of Arlong’s top men came up to the larger man approached that the crowd began to quiet.

“Why don’t we send Hatchi?” He asked, as the crowd began to laugh, its leader included. “The army can’t have many more disposable men, so how ferocious can this one be?”

“Then it’s done, let’s send Hatchi.” Arlong smiled, his jagged scar seemed to glow in the faint light.

Luffy relaxed, his hat covering his eyes as his feet were perched on the other chair in front of him. Zoro, sitting across from him, was shaving any stubble that crept in from the day before. He occasionally looked up at this seemingly harmless companion, wondering what his fate would be.

“I wouldn’t recommend going out there”

“Why is that?” Luffy asked, not even looking at the other man.

“There are a lot of people out there that will either hurt you or ignore you. If you can’t handle yourself in a fight, it’s pretty much all over.” Zoro looked back at the mirror as he shaved the last bits of cream used to soften the process.

“I can handle myself fine. Why would people ignore me?” Luffy looked up.

“People who live in this town want to stay as normal as possible; be the common people of the west,” Zoro paused. “You know, morons.”

Luffy laughed his legs lifting off the chair. He used the opportunity to sit facing Zoro. Before he could get out a word, the pair heard the ground shake slightly, something different had placed itself there. A little up the road, a hulking mass of a man came thundering down the street riding an ox. The ox, cleverly enough, had painted markings showing which side was okay to pass it’s rider on. The man came to a stop at the saloon before hopping off his, odd, stead, tying it down to the post along with the other horses. Chopper, the town’s doctor, rose over on his horse.

“Um, excuse me,” He stuttered. “You aren’t allowed to park livestock here.”

The rider turned around to the young man before straight up punching his horse in the face. As if nothing happened, he walked straight into the saloon, breaking the doors in the process.

The makeshift sheriff and deputy were interrupted again by a blonde with an oddly shaped eye brow bursting into the room.

“Sherriff. Hatchi is here, I need your help.”

“Sanji,” Zoro muttered, searching the desk drawers for another bottle of alcohol.

“Shut it, Mosshead! I don’t need this today.” The blonde growled back. “I have a job that I need to protect, unlike some around here.”

“Yeah, well, this jobless hack is gonna be the one that gets all the action,” Zoro smiled, “Cause you’re too scared to fight back.”

“Who is Hatchi?” Luffy asked, wanting to get to the fighting as soon as possible.

“He’s not a ‘who’, more like a ‘what’,” Sanji said, his face showing obvious distain. “But I thank you.” Sanji smiled before opening the door.

“The idiot’s gonna-“ Sanji paused, before looking back at the pair. “I mean the Sherriff is going to do it,” he cried out before running out into the chaos.

“Want me to take care of it?” Zoro asked, looking up at his self-appointed leader

“Is he worth fighting?” Luffy asked, unsure of whether or not he should get ready for a fight.

“Unless you like fighting big hulking guys, then yes?” Zoro said, his hand resting on one of his swords. 

“Let’s check it out”


	2. Tired

After a trip to the saloon and an extremely short fight later, Luffy and Zoro had Hatchi in custody. Upon reaching the saloon, Luffy realized all it took was a good hit to the head and some well-placed stabs (thanks to Zoro). With this quick victory, the pair became the talk of the town, each member spreading the story. The story, it seemed, reached a small village not too far from Arlong Park itself.

Arlong was furious, but also confused. What type of men could take down a powerhouse like Hatchi so quickly? If this pair was that powerful, maybe he shouldn’t poke the bear too much before latching his claws into them. Maybe, he should use beauty to suede this potential beast. That always works on the weakest of them. But if this ‘Luffy’ is as strong as everyone claims he is, the simplest of beauties would not suffice. He had to bring out his little doll.

~~

Nami powdered her chest, her heart beating faster than usual in anticipation of the job that was slowly creeping her way. A sharp knock on the door, a quick shout only caused the door to open before Arlong entered the small dressing room, his form taking up a decent amount of space.

“Arlong,” Nami said, looking up at the man who entrapped her so many years ago. A man she was forced to work for, but due to his unsettling weakness for the girl, she could get away with scraping by at minimum work at maximum profit. Mostly, she performed in dirty saloons for dirty men to look at her in awe. Thankfully that is where the line ended; she refused to go any further. While she resented her captor, she wanted to remain as dignified as possible, for her own sake.

“Hello my little one,” he smiled, looking down at the girl he watched grow up, half covered in a robe. “I have a task for you.”

“What is it you need?”

“I need you to seduce and abandon the new meat sack the army sent to ‘keep an eye on us’.” Arlong accentuating the last few words, as if they were a hilarious joke only he knew.

“Seduce?”Nami whispered, “You can’t possibly mean… I told you I would never do something like that.” The red head was furious. Her bargain with the man couldn’t be broken now, not after all she had given him these years.

“This isn’t one of the normal meat sacks. This one might be a problem with us. I need my best girl on this,” Arlong said, trying to stroke the women’s cheek. The woman learned long ago that cringing only brought more problems with it.

“I don’t have a choice, do I?” The red head asked, already knowing the answer.

“I know you will get the job done.” Arlong said before making his way out of the room.

Nami stared into the mirror for a long time after that, unsure of how to get herself out of this as cleanly as possible.

~~

Luffy and Zoro made their way into the saloon for a well-deserved celebration feast. Luffy could smell the food in the air as he and Zoro sat at the table closest to the stage. The green haired man waved over a waiter with a rather large nose who nodded to the pair before beginning is path to them. Apparently there was a special singer in town for one night only. The pair ordered everything on the menu before settling down the drinks the waiter, named Usopp they later learned, put in front of him. Zoro had ordered just a straight up bottle of whiskey while Luffy had ordered an odd drink called Cora that was highly recommended for those who do not drink. As soon as the sweet liquid touched his lips, half of the rather large glass had been consumed in frenzy. After the drink was done, Luffy immediately waved to Usopp for another one, Zoro beside him, waving up a few fingers for a second bottle.

The lights went dim before the food came to the table, much to Luffy’s distain. But something told him that the packed bar must be backed up in the kitchen as well. He noticed the blonde man from earlier standing in the back of the room, near the kitchen doors. He looked almost restrained, as if the two men who looked like chefs standing beside him here holding him back from something. The band started up before Luffy could think too much into the situation. He focused on the stage, as a man with bright blue hair walked across.

“How are we feeling tonight, gentleman?” He shouted to the crowded audience. They erupted in cheers, some even hooting and hollowing like monkeys. “Here is the woman you’ve been waiting for. The Lovely Nami!” he cried to an excited crowd, he bowed, making his way off the stage. Replacing him was a beautiful woman dressed in a very flattering suit. The crowd went wild.

“Good evening. My name is Nami and I am here to perform my rendition of the song, I’m Tired. The song that once closed down Switzerland.” The woman introduced herself. The crowd seemed to enjoy it, swelling with anticipation. “But before I do, I must slip into something more comfortable, if that is okay?” She asked an already enthusiastic crowd. With their resounding yes, Nami disappeared behind a dressing cover. When she reemerged, she was wearing…. something.  

Luffy wasn’t sure what she was wearing. It was something he had never really seen before. Most of the contact he had with women was Dadan, the older woman who raised him while his grandfather tolled away in the army. The other contact was a woman named Boa Handcock that he met one day on his trip into town. After what he felt like was ignoring her, she proclaimed her love to him several times before being escorted away by her entourage of servants. Both of those women had clothes on. Again, Luffy was not sure what this woman named Nami was wearing.

A red headed woman stood on the stage, a Black corset covered most of her body, but little was left to the imagination there. Long black stockings were held up by straps coming from her hips. Her long hair was decorated with black feathers descending down her shoulder holding her hair to one side. She seemed to wear a jacket. But it didn’t seem functional.  Luffy could clearly see through it, and a jacket that was longer than this woman was didn’t seem right. He seemed to have met her eye, the deep brown eyes seemed to stare directly into his being before the woman smiled and started her song.

 

********* Author’s Note. So a lot of plot points are based on the movie Blazing Saddles by Mel Brooks, which is an amazing film. I really wanted to base the song off of the same performance in the movie and I didn’t know how to write it narrative wise so I’m going to write it like it is in a musical. If that isn’t your thing, just look up the song I’m Tired Blazing Saddles and you’ll get the jist of it. Sorry in advance!********

 

**Nami:**

Here I stand, the goddess of Desire

Set men on fire

I have this power

Morning noon and night it's drink and dancing

Some quick romancing

And then a shower

( _The crowd laughs, Luffy seems confused, not sure if he gets the joke_ )

**Nami:**

Stage door johnnies always surround me

They always hound me

With one request

Who can satisfy their lustful habits

I'm not a rabbit

I need some rest

I'm tired

( _Nami pulls the chair close to her, visibly tired. Her shoulders slumped, as she plops herself in the chair_ )

**Nami:**

Sick and tired of love

I've had my fill of love

From below and above

( _Nami stands up, walking around the chair before putting one of her legs on the seat. The crowd_

_likes that_ )

Tired, tired of being admired

Tired of love uninspired

Let's face it

I'm tired

( _Nami kicks the chair away. The crowd gets rowdier. Luffy can feel his chair push back against him_ )

I've been with 1000's of men

Again and again

They promise the moon

They always coming and going

Going and coming

And always too soon

( _The crowd laughs. Nami looks over to the piano by the bar at two women standing there. One had bright blue hair while the other had jet black hair_ )

**Nami:**

Right girls?

I'm tired,

Tired of playing the game

Ain't it a crying shame

I'm so tired

God dammit I'm exhausted

( _Nami made her way over to the side of the stage that Luffy and Zoro sat at. She sat down on the stage before turning to face Zoro_ )

Nami:

Hello Cowboy, what’s your name?

Zoro:

Zoro, ma’am.

Nami:

Zoro, ma’am?! Tell me Zoro ma’am, are you in show business?

Zoro:

Nope

Nami:

Then why don’t you get your friggin feet off the stage?

( _Nami kicks Zoro’s resting feet off of the stage. She hums for a bit, pretending to make her way across the audience only to come right back to Luffy. His straw hat resting on his lap._ )

Nami:   
Hello handsome. Is that a ten gallon hat or are you just enjoying the show?

( _The crowd erupts in laughter. Luffy is visibly confused as Zoro smirks into his drink. One of the drunk patrons breaks through the crowd. His face looked squished, almost like a cat._ )

Drunk Patron:   
Come here little pussy cat

( _Nami looks as if she is so tired that she entertains the thought. The man comes closer and moves to kiss her. Luffy stands up in protest. Nami defends herself by kicking the patron in the balls_. _He falls to the ground, no one cushioning his fall_.)

**Nami** :

Tired, tired of playing the game

Ain't it a crying shame

I'm so tired

( _Sanji breaks free, much to the cook’s dismay. He then proceeds to rush to the stage, as the band takes the opportunity to speed up the music, making vaudeville like song happen. Zoro sees Sanji rush the stage and bursts out laughing. He begins to shout to make fun of the blonde. Nami could really care less now this act goes. She honestly does not want to seduce Luffy.)_

**Sanji** :                                                                     **Zoro** :

She's tired                                                           (She's tired)

Sick and tired of love                                      (Give her a break)

She's had her fill of love                                (She's not a snake)

From bellow and above                                                (Can't you see she's sick)

Tired                                                                      (She's bushed)

Tired of being admired                                  (Let her alone)

Tired of love uninspired                                (Get off the phone)

She's tired                                                           (Don't you know she's pooped)

( _Nami anticipates a larger fight if these two continue so she sweeps back in to take the show_ )

**Nami** :

I've been with 1000's of men

Again and again

They sing the same tune

They start with Byron and Shelly

And jump on your belly

And bust your ballon

( _Nami brings her arms to her chest. Sanji looks like he might explode, as Ussop comes in to save the day and drag him away before he hurts anyone_.)

**Nami** :

Aye!

( _The crowd stands up and continues to cheer_.)

Nami:

Tired, tired of playing the game

Ain't it a freakin' shame

I'm so...

Let's face it everything below the waist is kapput!

**Sanji** :

Tired!

( _Somehow Sanji escaped Ussop, scooped Nami off her feet and took her off stage where he placed her gently back in front of her dressing room. He bowed, thanked her for her performance and disappeared, leaving an astonished Nami. The crowd outside was cheering, begging for an encore that would never come._ )

 

***********END NOTE**********

**I am a big fan of this movie, and I really hope I made this as entertaining as possible? I don’t really know. I’m trying to get back into writing and I wanted to practice screen play writing with action words in it. Thank you if you read my first abomination. Back to the regular format, for now.**

 

After the crowd died down, Luffy noticed a note that had found its way underneath his elbow. He slipped it out, unfolding it.

“What does it say?” the green haired man asked, taking another sip of his drink.

“I must see you alone in my dwessing woom wight after the show.” Luffy read as Zoro almost lost his booze. The town priest happened to walk by at the moment the note was read.

“Yo ho ho. If that letter means what I think it does, you’re in for a good night,” the strange priest laughed before making his way back to the bar. Luffy and Zoro watched the odd man disappear into the crowd before turning back to look at each other.

“What does it mean?” Luffy asked, the ma n across from him his only friend in this strange town.

“That means you’re going to get lucky,” Zoro responded. Taking a sip back, somewhat impressed this newcomer managed to find a special friend so soon.

“What? Does she help you find money or something?” Luffy asked, visibly confused about the whole situation.

“Did no one ever tell you about sex?” Zoro sat up, leaning into the table to help keep the conversation as contained as possible.

“Yeah, my brother Ace told me about it before he left our hometown. What does that have to do with luck?” Luffy asked, leaning into the table to match what Zoro was doing.

“It’s just a phrase to say that you’re going to have sex. It’s so you can talk about it in public,” Zoro began to lean back as the conversation became safer. He noticed the kitchen doors start to swing open more frequently now, he hoped food was coming soon.

“Why don’t people want to talk about it in public?” Luffy asked, finishing off the rest of the glass of Cora.

“It’s a private thing; people don’t like to talk about their sex lives in public,” Zoro rested his chin on his arm.

“But this woman who doesn’t know who I am wants to have sex with me?” Luffy asked, still confused of how all of this is connected.

“Women are weird, man. I don’t even pretend to understand them,” Zoro admitted. He had someone once, but he lost her when they were both young. He hasn’t really been looking since them. He had other missions to focus on. “Maybe she actually liked your hat.”

“It doesn’t hurt to see what she wants,” Luffy said, still looking down at the note before him. “Maybe it’s for someone else.”

“Do what you want to, I plan on being here until the bar closes,” Zoro wanted to make himself comfortable at a booth close to the bar where he can relax in peace. He waved at Ussop, hoping he got the message that the pair was switching tables. At least that is what Zoro hoped he was smiling at. “So if she turns out to be a bitch, I’ll be here.”

Luffy was tempted, but the note was really urgent. He decided he would check if this woman was okay and then go eat. “I’ll be back.” He announced, before standing up.

“Wait, take this,” Zoro handed him the remaining whiskey that was in the bottle. “For more luck.”

Luffy took the bottle. After taking a small swig, his brow scrunched, unsure if he made the right decision.

Luffy knocked on the dressing room door before a feminine voice called for him to come in. He opened the door to find the red head lying on the couch as if she had been placed.

“Hello, Mr. 10 Gallon,” she cooed, beckoning for the man in front of her to come forward.

“Zoro was right,” Luffy whispered, “she really did like my hat.”

“What was that?” Nami asked as she made her way over to the taller man.

“I didn’t know you were that big of a fan of hats,” Luffy said, stepping back as she tried to get her body closer to his.

“Oh, I wasn’t interested in your hat. I was interested in what’s underneath.” She looked up at him again with those big brown eyes. Luffy almost got lost in them but he wasn’t sure of why she wanted his pants. He decided to hand her bottle of whiskey Zoro had given him for luck.

“Do you want some?” Luffy asked, unsure of what to do in this situation.  The red head took the bottle with a smile, before downing the remains of the bottle.

“You would get along with my friend Zoro,” Luffy said. “He likes whiskey as much as you do.”

“I’m not interested in Zoro,” Nami said, before composing herself after nearly filling her constricted stomach. She tried to take a deep breath, but the tightness of the fabric around her ribs made that nearly impossible.

“Are you comfortable in that?” Luffy asked, thinking she wanted to put something over her legs, or change entirely.

“Oh, do you like my outfit? I’m very comfortable in it. That is, if you really like it?” Nami tilted her head to the side, exposing her long neck.

“I mean, I don’t really know what it is, so,” Luffy started before the woman interrupted.

“Do you like the way it looks? That’s all that matters” She asked, her hands, finding their way to his chest. Luffy began to feel nervous. He had heard about sex before, but something felt wrong about this situation. Something about Nami’s eyes told him something was wrong.

“No, I don’t like it,” Luffy said, hoping that she would change into something she liked instead.

“Oh?” Nami said, grabbing one of the strings that held this corset replacing actual clothes together. “Then I can just take it off, if you want me to,” She continued, pulling the string tightly.

“Only if you want to” Luffy averted his eyes. He was never taught how to move forward from here.

“Here,” Nami said, taking Luffy’s arm and leading him over to the small couch the bar surprisingly provided for her. She placed the man on the couch before looking around. “It’s really bright in here.” She then began to blow out a few of the lanterns, making the room slowly darker. Luffy could barely see the woman slip beside him on the tiny couch. “Isn’t this better?” She cooed. Before giving him any time to respond, she continued. “Tell me, Luffy. Is the rumor true, that you army men are, gifted?”

“Gifted?” Luffy asked blindly, then he felt Nami’s hands on him.

“Oh!” She cried. “It is true.”


	3. Another One Bites the Dust

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a lot shorter than I remember it was when I was writing it. Sorry about that. Only one more chapter before the epilogue though!

“Nami,” Luffy whispered. “That’s my arm.”

“What?” Nami shouted, quickly getting up to light the lantern beside her. “Oh, I thought that was your…” Her voice trailed off.

“My what?” Luffy asked.

“You, you know,” the red head hid her face to hide the blush making its way across her cheeks.

“Am I really the person you called back here?” Luffy asked, trying to look the woman in the face. “Because we don’t really know each other, we don’t have to do this.”

Nami looked up at the man in front of her, surprised in his common sense of decency. She had heard horror stories from women across the states of men who come and take what they please and leave what remains. The man in front of her was different from the others, the desire to help in his eyes was genuine; maybe he isn’t a monster.

“Am I not pretty enough?” Nami played her last stitch effort on her part to gain some sympathy points, and possibly judge his sense of character. If this guy really was as good as he seemed. He had to prove it to her. 

“What?” Luffy was surprised. “No! You’re very pretty.” His face seemed to brighten as he said this. “It’s just, we can just talk?” Luffy had no idea what women want either, but from what Dadan always said, he never wanted to talk and never listened to her. So he planned to be different with this woman, because ignoring women didn’t work either. “Uh, have you found any good treasure lately?”

“Tr-Treasure?” Nami was confused, who was this man. Where had he come from?

“Uh, Dadan always talked about the loot she got. I thought women liked treasure.” Luffy looked embarrassed, his first attempt at small talk failed.

Nami paused, and then she smiled. “Well, unfortunately I haven’t found any treasure. There isn’t any treasure to find here though. If that is what you’re after, you better just leave town now.”

“Everyone keeps on telling me to leave,” Luffy muttered, annoyed that he couldn’t handle himself. “Who is so bad that no one wants me to fight? That Hatchi guy was easy.”

“You took down Hatchi?” Nami was astonished; ever since she was young she had seen men crushed by Hatchi. “How did you do it?”

“Zoro helped, but I just punched him in the face and he went down really easily,” Luffy scratched the back of his neck, as if it was not a big deal.

“Who- Are you even human?” Nami asked, unsure if she herself wanted to know the answer.

“Last time I checked,” Luffy laughed; his smile wide and inviting.

“There are people stronger than Hatchi,” Nami straightened up. “Men so large they could fill up this room. Do you think you could fight your way through them?”

“What have they ever done to me?” Luffy asked; his head cocked to the side.

“They own the town, they’ll want to own the sheriff too,” Nami said, grabbing a robe to cover herself up.

“Do they own you?” Luffy asked, following her movements with his gaze.

“I’m here aren’t I? I’m here to seduce you,” Nami held her arms to present herself like a prize.

“Why would anyone own you?” Luffy asked, coming closer to the woman, wondering how this could be.

“You wouldn’t understand,” Nami turned away. With all her confidence, no man has ever shown this much concern for her and not wanted anything in return. “It’s a really long story.”

“Okay. Are you happy?” Luffy asked. His desire to know her entire history was nonexistent. None of that mattered, only whether or not she was happy in her role; that was what mattered.  

“What?” The question sounded foreign to her. “What do you mean?”

“Are you happy, being used like this?” Luffy asked, staring her in the eye. He put his hands on one of her shoulders to get her to look at him. “Don’t you want to be free?”

Something about those words caused Nami’s entire world to crack. Tears began to flow from her eyes, her mind rejecting the idea that this man before her could end so many years of anguish. Her body took over, rivers of salt careening down her face as Luffy pulled the woman into his chest. He placed his prized straw hat on top of her head.  A silent rumble of anger was only present through the slight trembling of Luffy’s hand as he removed it from the hat and clenched it into a fist. What kind of monster uses people like this? How could someone force another human being into this kind of position? No, they didn’t see it as forcing someone to do something; they were less than people, only a means to an end.

The type of people that infuriated Luffy the most.

As he held the quickly recovering Nami, he vowed to himself to punish any person that could make this person cry. All she needed to do was tell him where they are.

 


	4. Tracing Back Your Roots

Nami rushed to get ready before she could follow those two idiots who decided to take the beast head on.

After she had finished crying, which honestly she was mad that her makeup work was ruined now, she quickly cleaned up her face before stopping the new ally from storming out the room.

“Wait, you can’t leave. He has to think we have sex,” Nami pleaded grabbing Luffy’s arm in a small attempt to prevent him from leaving.

“No,” Luffy said, pulling her along as if she weighed nothing. “I have to fight him now.”

Slowly, the pair made their way as silently as possible to find the man responsible for all this. They found him in an office, somewhere in the bar, loudly talking on the telephone. It took Nami several minutes of silent persuading for Luffy to not immediately burst in before listening to what Arlong had to say.

“He took down Hatchi, Croc. What else could I do,” The scarred man said over the bulky phone. “I had to make sure that he would stay quiet. Hopefully he didn’t rough up my little doll too much. I have to prove she’s a virgin to Nezumi to get the Army off my ass.” Arlong paused, waiting for the other side of the line to respond. Nami used all her weight to keep the man beside her in place. “The kid looked scrawny so he doesn’t seem like he would fuck her too hard. Hopefully this connection to the army will work out, or it’ll be your ass Croc. I’ll send you the results later. Bye.” Arlong hung up the phone, noticing the flash of straw before it quickly disappeared.

The pair rushed back into the room. Nami then proceeded to tell Luffy to start jumping on the bed.

“I mean, I will, but why?” Luffy said, climbing onto the large bed before starting to jump.

“Arlong is going to check on us; I want him to think we’re actually fucking.” Nami said, quickly disappearing behind the dressing curtain, removing her corset and actually getting comfortable. Tears forming back, knowing her promise of freedom if she worked hard enough was all a lie. She took a few deep breaths before quietly slapping her cheeks to wake herself up before coming out from behind the curtain. She looked up at the man jumping up and down, clearly having fun, before deciding to join him. The pair jumped together, Luffy grabbed one of Nami’s hands to make sure she did not fall off. Nami kept a clear eye on the shadow beneath the door, watching a large shadow appear and hover. The two young adults laughed as they were having the time of their lives, only stopping when Nami was sure the shadow outside the door was gone. After that, she started making a plan; a plan that hopefully might just work.  

Finding Arlong was not that hard, he was the type of person to make his presence known. His goons surrounded him constantly, so trying to find an opening was difficult. Luffy and Zoro took alternating shifts of observing when the best time to strike is, until one day, two familiar faces made their way towards the pair. Sanji and Usopp had come to them looking to be of service. Usopp was forcibly dragged there by an overly enthusiastic Sanji. Sanji was tired of the way that the town was being treated. If Arlong could force a beautiful woman to perform in that way for his own selfish desires, he could not stand idly by.

“You seemed to enjoy her show last night,” Zoro chimed in, looking for any way to irritate the blonde man.

“That’s because I thought she was doing it for herself. I would never cause any woman harm,” Sanji stood tall.

“Okay, you’re in,” Luffy announced, not even shifting his glance away from Arlong’s main base. Zoro groaned but decided it was more trouble to fight.

“I wanted to fight, but I could never take them on myself,” Ussop whispered.

“That’s fine,” Sanji said. “Just do what you can do, and we’ll take care of the rest.”

With that, the group made their way to face a boss.

~~~~

“Arlong!” Luffy shouted, his voice echoing across the base that served as the fiend’s palace.

The hulking mass that was Arlong made his way out of the building before coming to face the young man alone, his signature straw hat mysteriously missing. Zoro and Ussop were placed up in the hills above the park as the recon and backup team. Sanji was attempting to make his way into the compound itself and take it apart from the inside. They all hoped this crap shot of a plan would work, mostly because the group had no other option but to succeed.

“Oh? How was my little whore, army boy?” Arlong laughed. “Apparently she wasn’t good enough or you would have gotten the message, boy.”

“How could you use her like this, she’s a human being. She has her own dreams.” Luffy shouted. He stood tall against a man that was twice his height, but that didn’t matter. No matter what came at him, he would bring Arlong down.

The fight included many fists that were exchanged, but despite Luffy’s small stature, he really could take some heavy blows. The fists he threw back matched, it not overpowered the ones of the man before him. “ _How is he this strong_ ” Arlong thought to himself as he changed his stance to defend his weaker points. Near the end, Arlong resorted to biting the younger man on the shoulder, a bite so deep that it drew blood. Finally, Luffy had managed to beat the larger man down. Blood dripping down his mangled shoulder, he screamed into the sky, shaking Arlong’s men behind him. None of them knew what to do next, none of them have ever been able to defeat their leader. Presented with no other exit, they tried to make a run for it. Six men, tried to run, and six shots rang out. The men collapsed, clutching in pain at their pierced feet. Someone had shot each of the henchmen in the foot, Luffy looked up, to see Zoro and Ussop looking up at him from above. Sanji appeared in the front gate carrying a suitcase that looked very feminine for a house full of bad guys.

“Ms. Nami asked me to collect her belongings. Don’t worry, I handled anyone that got in my way.” Sanji said, pulling a cigarette from his pocket and lighting it. As he made his way over to Luffy, the dark haired man shouted “Thanks Zoro!”

“But, I was the one who shot them!” Ussop responded. Zoro smiled, neither confirming nor denying that Ussop was telling the truth.

“Whatever thanks!” Luffy shouted back. He clutched his shoulder in attempt to stop the bleeding, as he removed himself of the hulking mass that was Arlong beneath him. Sanji came to his side and tried his best to attempt any first aid possible. Zoro and Ussop made their ways down to the other pair, meeting a hurried Nami wearing a straw hat, carrying a rather large suitcase. As soon as she saw the blood, she dropped everything in order to take care of him. She stopped for a moment, before returning the straw hat to its owner.

“Thank you, Luffy” Nami whispered, as if only to the man before her.

“Of course, you’re my friend,” Luffy responded, resting his forehad against the woman’s, who responded with a smile.

“Oi, you better not be getting too friendly with Ms. Nami,” Sanji butted his head in splitting the two of them up. “Don’t make me have to keep an eye on you.”

“It’s okay, I’ve already almost saw her naked once, I’m okay,” Luffy deadpanned. Nami smacked her forehead before a laughing Zoro dragged away a furious Sanji for everyone’s protection. 

While the town’s problems were not over, the town decided the defeat of Arlong was a cause for celebration. Sanji had prepared a large feast as Nami proceeded to make herself comfortable with the girls who knew their way around the town. Thankfully, the women were welcoming to the newcomer, helping her find her grounds in this Wild West.

The winners ate their fill, Luffy, finally patched back up by Chopper, almost busted his stitches a few times, much to the doctor’s dismay.

“I don’t understand how he can eat so much after surgery,” The doctor cried, gathering his emergency medical supplies to patch up any leaking spots.

“He seems to eat like this normally,” Nami said, sitting down across from her new friend.

“How are you liking the new town?” Luffy asked, taking a moment to sallow and take a drink.

“It’s better than what I had. Are you going to remain Sherriff?” Nami asked, pulling one of the multiple plates on the table towards herself.

“I don’t really have a choice. My grandpa sent me here, so I guess I can stick around for a while, “ Luffy said, plucking the chicken leg from the stolen plate and placing it back on his own.

“I guess I can be happy you’re staying,” Nami said, stealing one of the smaller plates of desert with no protest from its original owner. “I can stick around too, see what there is to do now that Arlong is gone.”

“Good, I’ll be happy to have you around. I don’t know much about the area,” Luffy said, asking for a refill of his drink. Nami grabbed the whiskey bottle from Zoro before pouring herself a glass. Zoro, after she placed the bottle down, took the bottle back, drinking it from the mouth of the bottle.

“We’ll all help you. I’m pretty sure the town loves us now that we beat Arlong,” Zoro said, resting back in his chair.

“Yeah,” Luffy laughed. “Let’s see where this adventure takes us next.”


	5. Epilogue

Crocodile sat in his office, the remaining higher ups in the Arlong crew were standing in front of him explaining the past events.

“So, you’re telling me this army reject managed to defeat one of the strongest gang leaders I had in the East Blue?” Crocodile rumbled, his anger showing even in its hushed tone.

“Yes, sir. He has powerful allies, and they only seem to be growing by the day. He needs to be stopped. That’s why we came to you, sir.” He said, his voice shaking.

“You’re lucky I’m the Attorney General or I’d kill all of you worthless shits. I’ll call in a favor to Moria, see if he can pencil him in. All you have to do is get him arrested.” Crocodile leaned across the desk, looking the two men in the eyes. “Do you understand?”

“Yes, sir!” they cried.

“Good. Bring me this Straw Hat Sherriff, I’ll handle him.” Crocodile paused before beginning to laugh. The remaining men began to scramble out of his office as quickly as their feet can take them.


End file.
